Crafting the Life Mosaic

                                                                                          Artwork by Kim Bielmann Cabotaje

Though in my bones I’ve long understood life to be composed of sinuous curves, I’ve also struggled with the idea we’re fed that you’re supposed to know what your life’s work will be and who you will marry and how you will live so that you can move forward.  The possibility that you should be pretty darn certain has gotten me stuck more than once in life.  At the same time I was considering that there just might be some truth to this singular goal approach to our purpose, I continued to act on those things I was called to do even when they didn’t seem practical or hold up to others’ definitions of success. 

I took more classes than I needed to in college because I just felt drawn to them.  I’ve worked at jobs that paid far less than I was “worth” because the experience felt so valuable to me. I changed course on a path that didn't feel right even before I could fully articulate why.  I gathered up skills and understandings that at times seemed disjointed and possibly made me appear to be scattered.  I continued to move forward even though I often struggled with doubts.

And so it is interesting that just recently one of my big ideas about life purpose has crystallized.  Among other reasons, I think it is the rule of threes that has finally allowed me to fully embrace and internalize my belief.  I am referring to the phenomena in our culture in literature (The 3 Little Pigs), in religion (heaven, hell and purgatory), in politics (life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness), etc.  We believe that things presented or created in threes have a certain magical fullness.

Here are my three encounters with the thoughts of others that have solidified my own perspective on purpose:

An Anais Nin quote that has long given me comfort:

“There are very few human beings who receive the truth, complete and staggering, by instant illumination.  Most of them acquire it fragment by fragment, on a small scale, by successive developments, cellularly, like a laborious mosaic.” 

An excerpt from Steve Jobs’ Stanford graduation speech:

“Much of what I stumbled into by following my curiosity and intuition turned out to be priceless later on… None of this had even a hope of any practical application in my life.”  It was ten years before he found a use for the knowledge of calligraphy (how I do love fonts!) that he gained when indulging in his college meandering.  It wasn’t in looking forward and attempting to have all the answers before he began that things made sense, Jobs clarifies.  “You can only connect [the dots] when looking backward.”

The idea of the “slow hunch” from the Steven Johnson YouTube video “Where Do Good Ideas Come From?”:

“Breakthrough ideas almost never come in a moment of great insight—in a sudden stroke of inspiration. Most ideas take a long time to evolve and they spend a long time dormant in the background.  It isn’t until the idea has had two or three years, sometimes 10 or 20 years to mature, that it becomes accessible to you and useful to you in a certain way…Good ideas usually come from the collision of smaller hunches so they form something bigger than themselves.”

I know that there are some individuals who have a passion, even from a very young age, that gives them a focus that drives their life—thank goodness for the scientist dedicating her life to finding the cure for a disease, for example. But I have come to believe that if I just listen to what is calling to me, even in a quiet voice, I will eventually see how apparent diversions on a meandering path fit into the bigger picture.  By trusting the intuitive placement of bits of colorful and sparkling glass, I will allow a shimmering picture to emerge and will be all the richer for the experience. 

What path has your purpose taken?